BLOG DESIGN UPDATE + why I've thought I should stop blogging

January 10, 2018

k guys. notice anything different around here? YUP. I CHANGED MY TEMPLATE. thoughts?!?!??! gotta admit I got semi emotional before I changed my design from my old one like I always do, but OH YES I realllllllly am pleased with how it turned out. THX SARAH FOR HELPING ME + BRAINSTORMING SESSIONS

tbh this month has been the first time in a long time that I've actually considered quitting blogging. I always come concerned that I'll turn into a fake human, all about impressing others to get their approval. which I guess will be there no matter what I do.. back in April of 2017 (WOAH SO LONG AGO RIGHT LOL) I wrote a draft post about my feelings on this topic. it got really lengthy and after I finished it, I decided to make some changes in my blogging style, but not publish the post. here are a few excerpts to explain.

There is a thing called your love language - kinda similar to the personality type quiz thing - this is where you answer a bunch of questions to see if they can pin point your 4 love languages. Big shocker for me, my top one was "WORDS OF AFFIRMATION."
and bro let me tell you YES THIS IS SO.
It has always been a little something in the back of my mind. A little pat on my ego - that comments will flow, that my blog is near popular. I remind myself over and over again that no this isn't how it should be. I would refocus and shake myself out of that mindset.
cuz this blog -- this life -- isn't supposed to be about me.

but I'm human. and I fail.  A LOT. 

The fact is, the blogging world isn't much different than the real one around me. There is still peer pressure, the cool and trendy things, aesthetic to achieve...let's face it, someone is always doing better, hitting that mark that you wish you could just briefly touch. And I don't want to be like that for someone else or deal with that pressure from others myself

like I wish community could srsly just be community.

My goal has always been friendship. I love that I'm able to write these things and know what those said friends read them from all over the world. I just don't love the inevitable jealously and constant beatings that we give ourselves bc our blogs aren't up to the standards that we think we have to be at. Instagram is the same way, but worse.

followers. likes. thumbs up. comments. those numbers matter to bloggers, youtubers, instagrammers, etc. it beats a person down.

I guess I'm just telling you to ignore everything you think about every single social media human and know that

  • they struggle to be aesthetic (also I'm not even close so lol)
  • finding our original ideas are best but it sure isn't easy
  • posts are NEVER flawless. I cannot even come near to all my typos and grammar errors. xD
  • we are mainly introverts making a small effort to seem extroverted and put together when we usually write posts weeks after the photos were taken and are laying in bed while sick (aka me) 

the plain truth is humans are a jealous people. I see it in myself. jsyk, we don't have to be like this tho. Personally I find that silent jabs are worse than the ones straight to your face..mainly bc its way more shocking from the ones you thought were your friends. 

I'm sure I am not the only one who has dealt with these feelings before. there might be a point when I do quit blogging..not sure what the reason will turn out to be, but I'm just being honest. 

btw, how do you feel about the blog posts going live on Wednesdays now??? 

I am going to close this post for now.......I'd love to hear your thoughts on this + a personal story of how you've struggled to keep going throughout the pressure 


  1. Man, this post spoke to me on several levels. Such an encouragement to know its not just me. >_< I, for one, am very glad you aren't stopping posting on here. ;)
    AND BTW, I LOOOOOOVE THE NEW LOOK! *double thumbs up*

    1. aw I'm so glad!! and duuuude. it's not, I promise ya! I'm glad too bc tbh I still really love blogging <3
      EEEP SO HAPPY!!! xxxx

  2. I love the new blog template; it looks absolutely beautiful <3
    And the struggle is real girlfriend.
    I've found that my blog is oftentimes just a way for me to talk without actually talking, you know? It's a way to get my thoughts out there and if someone likes it - that's great. But if not, it's mainly just for me and that's ok.
    Also this <3
    "we are mainly introverts making a small effort to seem extroverted and put together when we usually write posts weeks after the photos were taken and are laying in bed while sick" << so relatable
    Thanks for sharing Jules :D love ya <3

    1. you're super incredibly sweet, Ashley!!! <3
      ikr - isn't it??!??!
      yusss! It's a fantastic place to share what you're becomes a public journal of sorts. 100% AGREED ABOUT IF THEY LIKE IT OR NOT. I write some tough things and am always expecting harsh responses..and am blown away when they're not there.
      hehee!! FOR SURE RIGHT? like I'm pretty introverted but also extroverted (like 50/50) but I AM SO SICK SO LOL
      love ya Ash <3

  3. Wow, this was definitely spot on. I feel the same way about peer pressure and trying to get to the same level of 'aestheticness' as all those professional bloggers out there. Blogging can be so difficult, because while you're trying to be unique, there are other bloggers and social media influencers out there who are just better? And its also sooo discouraging when you see that your content is under appreciated, especially when you work SUPER hard on it. All in all, blogging can easily kind of turn into a sick game of trying to be better than others? And it really shouldn't because blogging is supposed to be about expressing yourself and expressing your unique self and opinion? PHEW, rant over. But seriously, thank you Julia for writing this. It has definitely struck a chord in me.

    Sarah |
    (P.S. the new design is beautiful! I love those succulents and the new title font!)

    1. I think what I'm learning is that there really are no professionals at anything...just that a lot of people make it LOOK that way. like LOL I'm sure there are some people who might think I'm just blowing steam bc I just got a new template for my blog..but the fact is, I just wanted a change.
      BUT DON'T YOU DARE GIVE UP. cuz I promise you that you're not underappreciated, especially if what you write is honoring to God. <3
      AW DUDE. thanks for commenting!!! <3
      (p.s. xxxxxxxxx)

  4. Starting this post, I was TERRIFIED you were going say you were giving up on blogging. I'm so glad you aren't, because I love you posts so much!

    I think I have the same love language as you. But I also NEED physical contact. Hugs, kisses, holding hands, a pat on the back, anything.

    I have such a hard time realizing, that person with the weird photos and poorly written posts, are just a like me. They're doing they're best, they're learning. I'll sort if "shun" bloggers who's blog I don't like. They'll always comment on mine, but I'll never comment on the theirs, and that's really sad. I remember being (and I still am sometimes) who didn't get any comments or interaction. And it really didn't feel great.

    This post was so great, Sarah. It seriously made me start thinking about things I keep shoving away. By the way, LOVE the new blog design!

    ~ Ella Marie

    1. awwww you're darling! tbh, I felt like the title was ALMOST click baitish but like legit these are honest feelings so I left it XD XD

      LOL YOU DO! so you understand!! (yeah actually I am 100% not like that.. I prefer to be left alone lol!! ice cream is my form of comfort hehee)

      yeah... I actually struggle most with even finding time to comment on other blogs! like I read posts and sometimes comment, but a majority of the time it's like I LIKE ALL OF THESE POSTS NOW WHAT XD yeah..not having interaction is a TERRIBLE feeling

      hehehe I'm actually Julia, bUT DON'T WORRY ABOUT TI XD everyone thinks we are twins ;) ;) thanks so much for commenting!!

  5. The blog looks great Julia! Thanks for your thoughts on this, it's something I think allllll of us deal with and should face up to. ;-)

    1. eep thanks my Emma!! <3 yeah... it's rough. I guess I could consider this part of my EXPAND + GROW series lol!!! *hugs*

  6. ohohoho what a cute new template yo yo. *sparkly eyes* love it.
    i've been thinking about this since i started blogging lol. like there is so much peer pressure and a lot of the time we do seek that affirmation that makes us feel good. but as i blog longer, i am finding that i have drifted away from that (which is such a good thing tbh). it doesn't matter to me anymore whether someone comments on my posts or not - mostly because my audience's more for myself? like idk.
    but anyway. i think a lot of people comment on other blogs to get more attention to their own. and they give love and expect love back. which isn't how i work a lot of the time??? especially now. like even as a Christian, we should strive to be more like Christ, giving without expecting anything in return. sometimes that means saying the hard things on your blog. sometimes that's commenting on other blogs and encouraging them, but getting no comments on your own posts??? idk. I JUST WANT TO ENCOURAGE PEOPLE TO BE SELFLESS. it hurts and it's hard, but in that selflessness, you press in closer to Jesus who really is the only one that can satisfy the needs in your heart. like seek Him above all. that's where you'll find true contentment. not in comments. not in followers. not in likes. not in the approval of others. just Him.
    anyway, there's my blob of a thought. xx

    1. *grins* thanks my friend Cally <3
      but like. you need to take this comment and turn it into a blogpost of your own bc wooooooooooooooooooooah bro. every single thing you said has so much truth and power and honesty but REALNESS in it. like legit, you understand <3
      keep being who you are Cally xxxxxx

  7. Phew; I'm glad you're not going to quite blogging. That would be so sad for all of us who enjoy your blog so much!!!

    I really like your design changes; nicely done.

    Those challenges are SO REAL for ALL bloggers; I'm glad you talked about them. I especially have a hard time with feeling like my blog isn't aesthetic or "me" enough. And I wonder whether people really enjoy reading it. But I have to remember that I don't blog because I have to or what people think of me; I blog because it brings me joy. <3

    Wonderful post; Julia!

    1. aww Kendra!!! you're so kind! I would miss you all sooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo much <3333

      thanks!! <3

      PHEw. IM NOT THE ONLY ONE. yeah... aesthetic seems to of popped into our lives all of a sudden like. CUZ I DON'T REMEMBER THIS STRESS BEFORE?? dude yes keep blogging to keep joying. YO GOT THIS


  8. This is my first time commenting on your blog, actually. Don't know why I haven't before, because I have been reading your blog for a long while (I guess I just got used to being a "silent-blog-reader") *nervous laughter*

    But man, this post is spot on. I haven't been blogging for long (maybe three months), but I absolutely understand all the doubts and wonderings about life online vs. life in real life. It's so easy to live a totally different life than what you portray online, and keeping balance between that is SO HARD. (like when you post a photo on Instagram that you took weeks ago, and yet the caption is relevant for the moment you're in, but somehow it seems fake, ya know?).

    And even when people like you, and appreciate your stuff, there is doubt there too because you start wondering if they would like you as much if they met you in real life. Like maybe they don't really like me, maybe they only like the "online-me'?

    So…before this comment grows to be blog-post length, just know that a lot of us (me for one), get it and we're with ya. Community is so so needed.

    all the best to you,
    p.s. I love the smol plants on your header. (you must be a fellow plant-person, lol)

    1. AHHHH HELLO KEIRA!!!! (jsyk one of my book characters shares her name with you so YOU'RE A FRIEND <33333) don't be silent any more k ;)

      wow 3 months! You've got this thing. Me at three months was posting pictures I liked off of Pinterest XD XD (I was really YES YES YES. it is easy, but it's totally something I try to NOT do. 1) bc I know I'll regret it if I do + it's dishonest 2) it's actually much more fun to be me 3) those reasons are good enough XD

      yeahhhhhhhhhhh have you been reading my thoughts???

      awww thanks Keira! LETS BE A COMMUNITY <3

      (dude I love plants <333333333)

  9. Do you know how happy and good your blog makes me feel? xxxxxx I don't always comment but I will read through your posts with my sister and I will die laughing and nod through the stuff you write. You are such an incredible person as you are, don't change your life because that's just the best thing ever <3 Sending so much love xoxox You're the best as you. Never hesitate to hit me up on email because I will be quirky and weird and real and I will never judge you or anyone else for that matter srsly. <3 You do you .

    AND BTW I LOVE LOVE LOVE your new blog design, the little plants are soo cute :")

    1. I DUNNO WHAT TO SAY. you like blew me out of the water with every single work you wrote in the comment and I'm over here like


      srsly Anna, you are so sweet so stop it !!! I can't take any more


      THANKS SO MUCH *waters my little plants* *hugs them*

  10. NICEEEEE template!! I recently updated my own for 2018. xDD BLOGGER BUDDIES!!!! <333
    Hey, you're not alone girlie. Everyone thinks that everyone else is like way more aesthetic than they are...or that they're style isn't good enough. I have a private blog, and I think that helps for where I'm at right now...writing for myself and for God's glory, making sure to keep my desires in check -- make sure that I can want lots of followers and comments and love, but have the mindset that I don't NEED those things to be a good blogger. LOVE YOU. xxx

      aww thanks Amelia. yes, having a private blog does help with that..some. bc like it's always there anyways.
      thanks for encouraging me *hugs*

  11. Aaaah my goodness me. I love the new design a heap. <3 <3

    I totally relate to comparing yourself. I know I shouldn't do it, and that people probably do it back to me but it's so hard not to??
    Like, I look at a blog that I follow and think "they have twice as many comments on their blog as on mine. How come? Why don't that many people comment on mine? Am I that much worse than this brand new blogger??" And it's so easy to get depressed about it.

    I am getting better, but it's such an important thing to stop myself from thinking that way. Because it's not helpful for me, or for my readers.

    1. *grins* *covers face* BUT FOR REAL IM SO GLAD YOU DO <3

      ikr! it's 100% human, which I guess makes me feel better, but all the same IT DOESN'T HAVE TO HAPPEN YA KNOW. awww man. I get you. or a lot of the time it can be the opposite too!! I'VE FOUND SOME GREAT BLOGS THAT LEGIT DON'T GET COMMENTS AND I'M LIKE whhhyyyyy

      mmhhmm yes. so much truth. MISS YOU FRIEND <3

  12. I love your new template!
    Awww.... Don't give up! You are impacting the lives of readers every time you share the struggles and goodness of life.
    Be encouraged, God has a purpose and a plan for your blog.

    You can visit my blog at -->

    1. xxxxxxxx
      awwww, thanks!! wow tho..Idk what to say.
      I am encouraged..... more like crying really *sobs* thanks friend <3

  13. The plants!!! As someone who was just wishing for the 3 millionth time yesterday that I had a place to put a table and just cover it with ferns and violets and ivy and succulents, I approve of this artistic touch! <3
    And this is all very true... so true. I have blogged for... has it really been over ten years now?! The whole time, I frequently swing between feeling like a "bad blogger" (no graphics, no "brand", no schedule), and feeling like a fake, because those things aren't me. I blog as a place to be me. Rambling, excited about the smallest things, I write for the memories to look back on and the cozy atmosphere of writing, not really *for* an audience.
    I finally decided to stop trying to be a big blogger, and that it was okay to not share allll of the hard things, as long as I did acknowledge that there was more to my life, and I have been happy with the that decision... and I have even gotten blog followers, so I guess others are, too, which is so neat! I enjoy interaction with those followers once they comment... but I still don't blog with them in mind (is that bad? Haha!). It's what it would be if it was still just my Gramma coming to hear about my sibs! But I do understand the joy of being liked... because the comments or seeing a new follower still makes me excited. And words of affirmation are one of my top two love languages too, soooo, yeah. I think it will be something we struggle with the whole time we blog, but I also think that, like everything else in life, you can't shun all things that bring you a temptation of some sort... I mean, even cooking a meal can bring temptation to pride, and, um, we kind of can't stop that. The Lord uses it to grow us, to show that he is mighty enough to use our weakness!
    Thanks for this post, dear!

    1. I LOVE MY LITTLE PLANTS NOW XD XD XD and yes. I agree. let's do that (too bad it's winter and legit everything is dead......................................................)
      WOAH. 10 years?!?! bro you're a pro!! yes, and see, that's the best way AND reason to blog like EVER. I feel like I am beginning to fit more in that area bc tbh, I AM A WEIRD HUMAN XD XD
      awww I love your description of why you're blogging. I feel similar with a lot of those things!! and WORDS OF AFFIRMATION LOL yup that's us. XD hmmmm yes. truth there.


  14. This post. You put into words beautifully what blogging FEELS LIKE, it is such a struggle to just be yourself and not always be anxious about follows and likes and who does what and everything else. I can totally relate to this! Thank you so much, your posts are always the best!!
    P.S. Love the new design!

    1. oh wow! really?!?! Sarah told me this post was depressing hahah!! You're so sweet. YOU CAN DO THIS TOO <33333
      no way. like *all the hugs and ice cream* THANKS BRO


  15. First off, LOVE LOVE LOVE the new design, it is GORGEOUS! :) Seriously so beautiful. Also, I am so glad you addressed this because quitting blogging has been on my mind/heart lately. I had a plan to start blogging again in the new year, but so far I haven't. It's been rough. I think comparison is a HUGE part of it and also, running out of steam. I don't have a ton of advice on this subject since it's something I'm experiencing right now, too, but this post was so timely! Thank you for sharing your thoughts!! <3 I'm glad I'm not the only one who feels this way.

    1. first off, THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU. <3
      awww man really? I would miss you dreadfully if you did leave! yeah... I know what you mean tho. It is rough - it's rough to be you in a world of people you wish you were like. BUT LOL WE FORGET THAT WE ROCK TOO. I gotta remind myself of that more (is that odd and vain??..)
      no. in no way are you the only one who feels this way <333

  16. This post was so good, but also sad because it was so relatable. XD I also love the Words of Affirmation part of blogging, and my goal is also friendship. My favorite part of blogging is all the amazing friends I've made. ♥
    And honestly, I don't know why but I barely ever check my stats. Maybe because it's disappointing (XD), but probably because I just don't care that much. The stats I do care about are the comments, because they hold so much love on both sides, and so many fun and funny conversations. ♥ I try to care about the people, not the numbers, because numbers are cold and lifeless and people are... beautiful. :)

    Also, I LOVE your blog, even though I don't usually comment (for some reason the comment server thing usually has... um, trouble digesting my comments), but I read all your posts. ;) I would be so sad to see you leave, but I understand what you're saying. ♥
    Annnnd, I *love* your new design! THOSE CUTE SQUISHY PLANTS. *heart eyes*

    ♥ Allison

    1. AWW ALLISON. hey bro. How's life??! same. SO SAME. I've met like three of my absolute best friends thru blogging. <3
      lol!! tbh, blogging stats are rarely honest? I can never get it to stop counting my views and when I am working on a new design or something I LOOK AT IT A LOT LOL. yuuuuus. comments are the bomb. *hugs them all* agreed.

      bro *sobs* you're so sweet. I'm sorry the comment thing has been acting up! I'll scold him for you. xD I would be so sad to leave as well...I'm not planning to at the moment. possibly in the future?..
      THANKS SO MUCH. IKR. I gotta go water them ;)

  17. Love the template, girl. It's beautiful. And yes, sometimes we try so hard at something that we wanna give up. Bc we want perfection...but our models really AREN'T perfect. Oh ho ho do I know what you're talking about. Not just with blogging, but with so many of my other hobbies.
    To anyone who's felt the need to be perfect: I had to learn not to give up. I fell in love with ballet at 14; an age when most girls are already semi-pros. Their bodies are beautiful, their formed to repetitious dance and they are perfection. I had to take dance (and still am) with girls younger than me, better than me. I embarrassed myself. I fell. Sometimes I wondered if I should keep on. I prayed about it.
    Then I got this pair of ballet shoes from the thrift store. They were my same size, new. I knew then. And here I am a year & 1/2 into ballet, already in pointe.

    So don't give up. If God wants you to do it, He'll help you threw the storm & make you stronger in the sun.

    We aren't perfect...but your blog is beautiful and teaching Christ through it will make it'll make everyone see love and hope and everything good.

    1. thx Michaila!! it's been so long since I've changed it. so I'm really pleased with the update. <3
      LOL SO TRUTH THERE. IDK why we do that. srsly gotta stop ya know.
      wow bro
      LOOK AT YOU. You're brave. I probably would have tried for a short time than give up bc lol I don't like failing too much o.o


      wow. srsly thank you girl. you're so sweet k <3

  18. First, I love your new template! So so cute. Second, I love this post.

    It's very relatable. I often used to find myself comparing followers or templates or Instagram feeds to my favorite bloggers. Honestly, it's silly and I have to remind myself that it's not important. After thinking about it more and more recently, I rarely check my views and followers and have let myself post more when I feel like it instead of trying to keep a strict schedule because supposedly that attracts followers (??). IT IS SO MUCH BETTER

  19. Oh this was the post where you announced your design change XD.

    So true! While it can get discouraging when someone else has a better audience/etc, I like to see it as a learning opportunity and something to take inspiration from. So it can go both ways. (also girl you're so aesthetic how)


let's be honest here peeps, comments rock. keep 'em clean and fun and I'll reward you with a virtual ice cream cone

*reluctantly hands cone over*