SEPTEMBER + I HAVE POISON IVY // I CRACK MYSELF UP - WHAT IS THIS GROWING UP THING AND uh 2017 is ending?

WOW THEY SAID THIS FOR REAL :

"Hey sister I found a moth and named it Motho and it's YOUR FAVORITE COLOR. But it died. Wanna see it?"
- me "uhh sure."
*little sister runs off and yells* "he's not buried deep!"
WHAT UHHHH she buried it wow

random kid at library "months have different amount of days, but weeks are usually the same."

"ask me a sad question"
-little sis "why do trees have to die?"

so my siblings are literally walking around smelling the empty vanilla bottle lol!!

*little sister singing ABCs* "LMNOPQRST *stops and makes a slurping noise* TEA MMMM."

"It's just so dumb in the movies when people spy on someone and the books are upside down. When I spy, I'm always sure my books are facing the right way." - Sarah

random kid : "what does peanut butter come from?"

"So this is a Humpty Dumpty joke. And it cracks me up. *breaks into laughter* SEE THE JOKE?!" - little sis

"I'm keeping my shirt backwards cuz the front is dirty but I love this shirt sooo" - little sib

"do you feel my heart beep?" - little sis

#JULIARYAN

*is putting rice in bowl* *is mentally thinking about how bad it would be if I spilled it everywhere* *spills it everywhere*

YES THIS IS ACTUALLY ME LOL AND MY LIFE

so Sarah and I are putting her new book shelf together right?
- me "Look! Finally something that makes the stickers ACTUALLY come off."
*proceeds to peel off sticker which tears and doesn't actually work*
- me "oh wow. I cursed it."

I slipped on a grape

me calling my dad in store *phone ringing and ringing and ringing* *hears hey!*
me - hey dad!
my dads voice - "hey leave me a message and I'll call you back as soon as you can."
me - "oh. it's the voicemail"

SO MANY COFFEE CREAMER TYPES

so we went to the Burger King drive thru (btw this is the first time in like a year or something) and they're like "name?" Which I gave. I pulled up to the first window to pay and the lady was like "$2.12?" And I paid. Then went to the second window and the girl looked at me and was like "Tim?...." so which I was like "uh no - Julia" she closed the windows and came back with the slushies and was like "I knew you weren't Tim but...I have to ask."
- me to Sarah "this one is going in my monthly post"

so smoke alarms can set off from paint fumes jsyk

me to sarah 24/7

THE LIBRARY HAS AN UPSTAIRS AND A BASEMENT I DIDNT KNOW THIS AND I HAVE A NAME TAG AH

smashed my finger in the door. #me

LIFE HAPPENINGS :

so my dad killed the wifi by drilling into the cord. (don't ask) This is my sister testing it. #loveher

me - " I lost a ponytail today"
sare - "me too."
*silence*

I MADE 6 BATCHES OF COOKIES BY HAND IN 5 HOURS WHICH IS = 180 COOKIES.

so Sarah pulled on a push door which we've opened like 162962873 times

cleaning my closet out and finding a journal entry from when I was 11 about how I'd love to work in the library LITTLE JULIA IT HAS HAPPENED

something is wrong with siri 

btw that jump rope is still up in that tree

so the AC broke on the 95 degree day...also the first day of fall what is this?

so sarah is driving???

i opened my own bank account and got one of those cards which holds money (the above gif applies perfectly) 

these are ghost peppers. And I picked them without knowing they were ghost peppers. I think I've survived

I kinda cracked up over the fact that I was returning a bunch of stuff at the library that I'd have to shelve lol

I GOT POISON IVY ON LIKE ONE OF MY LAST WEEKS AT WORK WHAT IN THE WORLD 

PIECES OF GOLD : 

HAHA TOO MUCH TRUTH IN THIS POST NATALIE
oh, cally, cally, cally. how even
jon's summer summed up + what he's learned
AUDREYYYYYYYYYY!!! this is a huge chunk of gold k
yes yes yes [for us dreamers from tracey]

WHAT HAPPENED IN SEPTEMBER :

• i
• am
• so 
• tired

there ya go lol i can't think anymore. but WHAT THE WHAT HOW IS THIS MONTH ALREADY DONE?! srsly tho this month has been a gem and shhhhhhh but I've got a secret happening XD XD I'll tell ya about it soon. 

EVER HAVE POISON IVY (if so helpful tips?)

2 HYSTERICAL THINGS FROM THIS MONTH?!!? 

TO ALL THE GIRLS OF THE WORLD (i've got a message) // reasons why you don't have to believe what you hear

WARNING : lots of capitals, bluntness, and well..honesty. Read on if you're brave (also those brave enough to leave comments get bonus points. ice cream WITH brownies. yup. yup.)

I'm SICK and TIRED of feeling ugly. I'm DONE with being in public and suddenly not feeling so confident. I'm NOT going to even talk about the glares I've received or the comments given to me about some of the abnormal things I do. and I'm EXHAUSTED from the knowledge that I'm not the only one who feels this way.

I'm SERIOUSLY SO DONE WITH THE PROBLEMS THAT SOCIETY HAS PLACED OUT THERE FOR US GIRLS THAT I'M WRITING THIS POST WITH A MIND WHICH IS ON FIRE

and arms flailing this is me

  CUZ GUESS WHAT

• you're not fat
• you are you + God made you perfect in an imperfect way 
• DON'T LISTEN TO WHAT THAT STRANGER SAID
• DON'T LISTEN TO WHAT THAT HUMAN YOU KNOW SAID
• you don't have to compare yourself 
• just cuz you might not have a guy-friend (at 14-17 gosh) doesn't mean something is wrong with you
• LIFE IS BEAUTIFUL REALIZE THAT
• days speed by and spending them wishing you were someone else just wastes what you've been given
• you're beautiful 

The problem is we hear so many negative things about our appearance, that we forget about God's grace and mercy and love. we short-cut Him and ourselves. bc LISTEN UP how we look doesn't define you. how tall or short, skinny or not, blonde or brunette, bangs or not, actual converse or the walmart fakeos IT JUST REALLY DOESN'T MATTER 

I want to scream.

I want to shout and shake and yell bc I'm so terrified 

I'm quite literally terrified that people sink further and actually BELIEVE the things they hear. 

the lies they are told 

you've got talent. Maybe its musical, or in writing, taking care of babies, gardening...last week I asked what your dream job was, and some answered with things I've never even thought of and guess what. That's how its supposed to be CUZ ITS YOUR DREAM. bc it's you.

I'm here to tell you that God doesn't listen to you when you look in the mirror and say "I'm ugly." cuz He doesn't know the definition of the word in you. It just isn't so. We are created in His image.  

so God created mankind in His own image, in the image of God He created them; male and female. (Gen 1:27)

*hopes i don't look like this*

perhaps I'm speaking out of turn, but tbh I'm speaking from my heart. No more listening to those lies, please. They hurt you and they hurt me when you believe them, but even more so, they hurt God.

also. be careful with your words. bc..you might be the one who are saying these things to someone else.

 Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen. (Ephesians 4:29) 

Just don't give up. tbh this is still about national suicide prevention week. I don't want to live without telling it like it is..and sadly, too many of us give up bc of feeling unworthy. YOU ARE NOT. k *hugs*

btw this is my older sister who is stunning

TELL ME YOUR THOUGHTS ON THIS 

DO YOU EVER FEEL THIS WAY?!?!

I GOT MY DREAM JOB + MY FIRST JOB INTERVIEW // journal entry post -- my headphones died AND LOTS OF CAPS

this post is probably going be a lot like my journal entry last night...which was totally not 4 pages long. XD bc yesterday was well CRAZY. AWESOME. FANTASTIC.ya know what? *grabs journal* 

Dear Journal, I almost don't know what to say. Today has been insane...went to work this morning, feeling excited + fighting the cold, left work around noon, came home, left again for my interview at 1:20, got there a bit early (found books while waiting), then went to the circulation desk at exactly 1:58 to let the librarian know that I was there for my interview. FOR MY INTERVIEW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 

Wednesday, September 13th, 2017 is probably one of those days for Julia which will always be remembered...bc you see, IT WAS THE DAY OF MY FIRST JOB INTERVIEW and the best part? ITS MY DREAM JOB. AT. THE. LIBRARY. 

I tried to stay calm and be myself..but if anything, I was mostly thirsty! Some of the questions were easy to answer. Others were interesting.. like "if someone handed you a magic wand, how would you design your dream job?" I thought hard about that one for a moment, and then replied that I'd give the magic wand to someone else bc I like a challenge. At the end of the 40+ questions, I had to fill out at alphabetical and numerical order thing. They told me that they would call by the end of the week to tell me their decision. 

Like, k, the thought of waiting 4 days was okay to me. LEGIT. yes, I was planning on filling those 4 days, but still. I knew I could handle it. probably more than I could what happened next.......

I got home around 4:30 (had to run to the store) and my sister was on the phone. (don't worry, this will mean something in a bit) Well, around 5pm my dad saw we had a voicemail AND IT WAS THE HEAD LIBRARIAN CALLING FOR ME. ALL SHE SAID WAS TO CALL BACK AND I DID BUT SHE DIDN'T ANSWER. I was sooooooooooo disappointed bc I knew that phone call meant something BUT I DIDN'T KNOW WHAT. and, I didn't think I would hear back since it was past 5:30....

that's when I called my bestie to tell her what happened/moan

 THANK YOU FOR BEING THERE GIRL XD XD then..........

MY MOM CAME TO ME WITH THE OTHER PHONE AND I HUNG UP SO FAST ON MY CELL WITH MY BESTIE BC THE HEAD LIBRARIAN WAS ON THE HOME PHONE AND WELL I GOT THE JOB. i still have to wait for my background check..... XD I'm now a full time page. I still can't believe it and MY MIND IS BLOOOWWWNNN. Training will be sometime soon..not sure quite yet when.

I basically go on about how my neighbor brought over 5 boxes of plums and how tired I was and apologizing for my horrible handwriting...

BUT GUYS FOR REALS THO I GOT A JOB AT THE LIBRARY !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

My bestie screamed when I told her. My mom got out celebratory ice cream cuz she knows me. My heart keeps pounding cuz I don't believe it yet. I woke up and legit grinned cuz "oh yeah. I FORGOT." #me  My siblings can't wait to check out 5914985010485 books and then dump them back so I have to shelve them all. they joke i'm going to be like this; 

I just really want to thank so many people....so many of you have been praying for my ever since I applied back in July. It means A LOT TO ME. also, thanks to God cuz obv He knows me <3

btw, I am also doing the #7DAYBIBLEDARE (I started Tuesday) wellllllllll, I just caught myself reading a short story my friend sent me LOL SORRY I FORGOT #willstartover 

BUT TELL ME HOW IS IT GOING FOR YOU?!?!?!?!

and my headphones died last night. help.

WHAT WOULD YOU DO TO WORK IN THE LIBRARY?!?

WHATS YOUR DREAM JOB?

HERE IS THE THING - JESUS IS SITTING RIGHT NEXT TO YOU // 1 week Bible dare + WHY DONT WE HAVE BIBLE TBR LISTS??

I've been realizing a lot of things lately. It's kinda like BAM BAM BAM BOOOM. aka that means A LOT OF THINGS HAVE BEEN HITTING ME IN THE FACE. I really feel the need to write them down..and I know you'll listen, so here I am.

ONE : JESUS IS RIGHT NEXT TO ME ALWAYS

and in this i mean, even when you think He isn't, when you're not speaking kindly of someone else, when you are doing something you shouldn't, when you are sad... I MEAN IT. HE IS LEGIT THERE. I was talking on the phone last night about this with my friend. I've come to see that I often overlook that fact. I think us humans do a lot. Like, in general, how often do you think about how we are floating on a ball in outer space????? LIKE??! UHM. HELLO LOL 

me : *looks in rear view mirror* *sees empty seat* 
me : "Jesus is sitting there."

TWO : uhm why don't we have bible tbr lists?!?

k so tbr lists are a big thing. I see blogposts about them ALL the time! and, duh, why not?! Books are FANTASTIC things. They're really beautiful and there are so many that they pile up waiting to be read --- yet, I've never seen a Bible TBR list. Ever. It struck me that reading one chapter in the Bible takes effort while reading 5 in a fiction book is a breeze. Yeah, that was more like a slap..

it is HARD to realize how petty my feelings are.... and man, it frustrates me!! so here I am, trying to change that with the below dare.

THREE : 7 day bible dare 

AND HERE IS SAID DARE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (jsyk i absolutely adore being told I can't do something and then proving otherwise...so) 
I'm here to suggest a dare to you. It's sadly asking a lot in a sense...but I'd like to ask whoever wants to join me in this. Basically, all you have to do is say goodbye to any other book for 7 days. I know a bunch of you out there who post things like " I read 2 books today!!" and hey, that's awesome!! but, for the next week (on whichever day you see this post - it doesn't matter!) let's just read the Bible. No fiction or non-fiction, magazines, whatever!  I'm super curious to see what happens. Are you???

COMMENT BELOW IF YOU'RE JOINING IN THE #7DAYBIBLEDARE

also please listen to this song. It's beautiful. basically all of Emile Pandolfi's stuff is actually.

one other thing. can we band together and pray? And, when I say pray, I mean PRAY. So entirely hard and so strong.. for Florida, for Texas, for the families who were effected by 9/11, for the states being burnt by wildfires, for your friends who left for college, for people to know they're loved by God - to stay, for our country and the leaders in office. There are a lot of things to pray about. We can't forget that <3 

that's it for today guys. A lot of thoughts, a lot of feelings..a lot of words. Thanks for listening and man, what can I pray about for you?!?! 

p.s I HAVE A JOB INTERVIEW ON WEDNESDAY I'D REALLY APPRECIATE PRAYERS THANKS 

PRAYER REQUESTS??

WILL YOU JOIN #7DAYBIBLEDARE ??

CAN WE HAVE DECENT EMOTION FILLED CONVERSATIONS THRU TEXTING ???? // emotion + how do you write it

I have had (and am having) a lot of online friendships. They mean the world to me -- I absolutely love the vast amount of things I learn from people all over the world! Such as, Jane from Australia (still think it's odd that you live in the future and eat lunch when I'm going to bed....), or Tammy from South Africa (WHEN CAN I COME VISIT!?), Jon from Fiji (still in shock over how Thursday is before Sunday...), and then all my friends in the states! *has gigantic mental list* like ITS OVERWHELMINGLY AWESOME. And, the best thing is, we are all friends with each other, have inside jokes, common likes, and most importantly, all have passion and love in Christ. 

ITS BEAUTIFUL but we can only talk through one way -- online. with written words. Like, okay, the ability to express feelings through typing on a keyboard is fantastically amazing. but is the conversation with your friend the same emotionally as it would be if you were in person? idk. 

TEXTING IS SO SCARY CUZ YOU COULD BE LIKE;

"oh man. ikr."

and the person who gets that text is like "WAIT WHAT DOES SHE MEAN BY THAT!?!??!?!" 

and have a panic attack. let's face it, we are all waiting for the sarcastic font. 

But, can we have some deep conversations through texting (or emails, comments, blogposts even!) YES GOSH WE CAN!!!!! also, we can have a lot of goofy ones, which have made MANY inside jokes *grins at nanowrimo gang of 2016* 

W A Y S  T O  S H O W  E M O T I O N  I N  W R I T T E N  T E X T 

• USE ALL THE CAPITALS ADMIT IT IT SHOWS EMOTION!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
• also those exclamation marks. hehee 
• you know when use crazy bloggers say *gives everyone pizza* or *sobbing* well, its cuz THAT IS GIVING YOU A MENTAL PICTURE     *gives away deep blogger secret* see. yup. and, do I talk like that in real life? nahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh. *shakes head* totally nope. (NEED THAT SARCASTIC FONT NOW HERE) 
• gifs. I didn't use those things for a L O N G  time but now I'm like how did I live before??? 
• silence. sadly, that is one of those ones where people freak and are like "I SAID SOMETHING WRONG." bc it took 2 hours to respond but really, I WAS LIKE DRIVING OR BREATHING OR WHATEVER LOL sooorrryyyyy 

and, ya know what I've learned, writing a blogpost or chatting with friends online is actually pretty easy. Sure, I have had mess ups, but heyyyy, that's a friendship learning curve. in fact, the area I struggle with more, is WHAT EVEN IS EMOTION?!?!?!?!??!?! cuz when someone says "OH. You're emotional." it generally means you're crying?????? or is this just in my life? cuz...like emotions are so deep and almost ouch to touch. 

E M O T I O N S 

• sadness
• happiness
• fear
• anger
• joy
• disgust
• surprise
• trust
• envy
• love

see what I mean?!?! It's one word with so many meanings. a lot of times, people throw it around without understanding that A) emotional doesn't mean JUST sadness B) an emotion filled convo could include MANY different options of emotions C) wow this post is full of the word emotion SORRY LOL

maybe this whole mess of words is just that -- a mess. Or maybe, it makes sense to you??

The point is, we can be empathetic no matter what. Compassion is a beautiful thing. So, if there is one thing I've learned while writing this post, it's this;

if someone texts you with and says "IM HAVING A ROUGH/EMOTIONAL DAY" don't automatically assume one thing. Listen, even if that means in between those lines.  maybe technology has changed, but people still need to be heard. also, cheesy gifs are good things XD

OKAY SIGNING OFF. I think the fact that I was in the kitchen for 5 hours making 180 snickerdoodles with Sare today has perhaps made me overthink everything?????/............... *crickets*

BTW YES THESE ARE PHOTOS FROM MY VACATION STILL HAHAHA #lazy #theyareprettytho #right

p.s. I once had a snowball fight with my friend 1,000 miles away....online. yup.

WHAT DO YOU THINK ABOUT EMOTION ??? 

HOW DO YOU HANDLE MISUNDERSTANDINGS THROUGH TEXTING ??